Parents Marry After Relenquishing Baby

It's been a busy and hectic week, Folks.  I have talked with at least one partner of five different couples who relinquished their baby and later married.  One other couple was married and decided it was best for the baby to give her a better home than they could afford at the time.

One couple never brought up the subject after they married.  Three of the couples silently have a cake with one candle on their baby's Birthday, but have never told the kids about the older sibling.  One couple divorced after five years and remarried eight years later.  The partners I spoke with wondered if they had the right to search for the baby (now an adult) they let go.

Question:  What do you think?  Have you been there?  What comments and advice do you offer?

I told them to by all means start the search today.  There were several first mothers that addressed this issue at the American Adoption Congress Conference.  Some had found the "lost" child and two were searching.  Reuniting was a blessing for all even though at least one set had not formed a close bond-yet.

Until next time,
Alice 
 
Adoption and Ethics: The Impact of Adoption on Members of the Triad
Adoption Forum: Intimate Discussions Search and Reunion in the Adoption Triangle: Towards a Framework for Agency Service to the Adoption Triad (Occasional Paper)